There's normally a whirlwind of thoughts going through my mind on a daily basis. And on average, approximately every hour, there is some sort of new input in that whirlwind. Whether that be a friend saying hello, a phone call, a text message, the advertisement on the side of my cup of coffee, the music playing in the room,.... I realize it's all an influence on my thought process. And I've realized I could spend years and hundreds of words on any one of these influences, and expressing how I want to, should, or am intended to react to these things. But in this, in most cases I find that God isn't in the racket, God normally isn't the flashy images, and God isn't in the Coffee either. And yet, while God is seen in all of His creation, normally God wants me to find him in stillness.
It's pretty strange dichotomy, but one I'll learn to live with daily.
As I'd said before, currently I'm finding myself preparing for another season of change and growth, much like the plants outside this time of year. And while I'm to learn to rest and prepare, just like all the rest of creation (and yes, even like God rests), a friend of mine (and dare I say mentor) had some good insight for me yesterday, that I'm still processing.
We talked about the things I'm looking toward defining more in my next year in Denver, and we talked about how I'd felt God's voice leading me in these things. Part of this conversation looked like this;
"Do you feel like you're the right one?"
"I'm pretty sure."
"Do you feel like God has told you to go ahead with this?"
"Yeah, I feel like this is what I'm supposed to do, but I'm learning to be patient and wait for God's timing."
"In my mind, if God has told you to do something, the longer the wait the more room you're leaving for evil to sneak in and pervert it. In fact if you really feel like God is telling you to do something, you really should be asking God 'Why not now?'"
And the best part of the conversation was that it left me questioning my real motivations in waiting.
More often than not, in the midst of all the things that Society is telling us, and all the things that distract us in our own minds, are we really waiting for God's timing, or are we even using the excuse of waiting for absolute silence, before we're willing to do what we feel God has told us to do? Are we really giving God the room to tell us what His will is, or are we waiting for it, at our convenience?
